PALOS HEIGHTS—Many of the ups and downs of foster care have been part of Laura Barkley’s life and joy in her five years as a foster parent.
She and her husband, Craig, initially fostered through the Rockford LSSI office until they moved to Palos Heights in 2013. They now foster through an office in Augustana.
Craig works in information technology, and Laura is a Methodist pastor. They have three biological children, ages 14, 12 and 8, one 5-year-old adopted son. They are currently fostering two children.
To Become a Foster Parent Catholic Charities of the Diocese of Rockford no longer offers foster care services. But Catholics are welcome to become foster parents. Call Lutheran Social Services of Illinois at 888/322-5774 to be referred to the LSSI office closest to your home. |
Fostering, Laura says, “is truly a matter of expect the unexpected. It is a roller coaster ride. … (There is) no neat checklist to foster care; you have to be completely flexible, knowing that things can change any day.”
She rattles off a short litany of children they have hosted:
�–� The day after their foster care license was approved on June 30, 2011, they received a 3-month-old boy to foster. “We fell in love with him the second we met him,” Laura says, explaining he was born premature, “drug addicted and very, very sick.” His mother and father were involved to some extent, and Laura made visits “so his mom could see he was okay.” In December 2012, the biological parents allowed the Barkley’s to adopt him.
�–� In 2011, the family also provided respite foster care for a little boy who would come for a weekend, a long weekend and once for a week — to give his grandmother who was fostering him a break. “People can choose to be a respite home,” Laura says. “You get to be the fun aunt and uncle and provide a great service.”
�–� In January 2012, the Barkley’s took in a little girl who suffered from effects of abuse, developmental disabilities and some physical issues. “We were (her) fifth placement in three years,” Laura says.
After a few months she was returned home where, Laura says, “I don’t think they are okay there … You find out how powerless you are … I have wanted to figure out ways to make a difference in the system itself … Even when we are at the point (where we are not fostering), I will continue to work on advocacy and how to make the system better for parents, foster parents and mostly for the kids.”
�–� Another little girl, 9-months-old, came to them for a few months until the Barkley’s moved out of the Rockford area. “We continued to be involved with her life and see her” with her new foster parents, Laura says. “She was adopted in 2013 … she’s doing very well.”
�–� In October 2015, they welcomed a newborn baby girl and, says Laura, “I really got to work with her mom. Her mom was doing everything she could, and really wanted to do better.” Laura sent the mother pictures of new moments in her daughter’s life and supervised visits with her.
“I thought she’d be with us a while, (but we) got a call. She was moving in with her grandmother right away. She’s doing well. We are hopeful for that little girl and her family.”
�–� The Barkley’s currently are fostering a 2-year-old boy they received when he was 20 days old. His mother was homeless and has not been involved. They are going through the slow system to adopt him. He has some sensory problems needing occupational therapy, but is the “happiest little guy. He can dance!”
�–� “Last but not least,” they took in a 20-days-old boy on Holy Thursday this spring. He was brought to them right from the hospital, Laura says. “Pretty much every child is substance exposed or addicted …
We’ve had him for a month (and) he’s doing really well … so far it seems he’s not suffering long term effects, but we need to keep on watch for those. We don’t think it will be a short term placement, but you never know.”
What keeps this foster mom going?
“Seeing the difference that love can make in a child’s life and the blessing of watching them grow and conquer problems,” she says. “And I’ve seen how God has worked through (our biological) kids” to help the fostered kids.