Pope St. John Paul II once said, “As the family goes, so goes the nation and so goes the whole world.” 

 

Such a prophetic statement could feel like a lot of pressure 

to some families who are just trying to maintain emotional peace during the holidays. Reality for some of us, unfortunately, includes deeply sown family conflict as we eat Christmas turkey and emotional baggage as we arrange Christmas presents. 

 

We might conclude that taking on responsibility for building my family is fine but saving the nation and the world is too much. We might think: “Just let me get through dinner!”

 

John Paul II spoke those words about family during a homily in Australia on the first Sunday of Advent in 1986. The pope used the Mass readings, which were the same we heard this past Sunday, to reflect on God’s plan for the family, which is to be, “the domestic Church … the Church in miniature … a sacrament of God’s love.” Again, we might counter: “My family, with its battles and failings, cannot possibly be sacramental.” 

 

Yet, we do have a cause for hope. During Advent, we anticipate the coming of Jesus Christ. The Son of God became incarnate within a family, the Holy Family. Jesus’ incarnation ensured that God knows intimately the struggles of family life. Understanding that Jesus is at the heart of all families, including our own, can transform our lives on personal and communal levels. 

 

We have our hurts. While we may not be able to remove easily evidence of the arrows slung by loved ones, we can prepare our hearts this Advent. We can try to model loving behavior, admit our own wrongdoings, and seek forgiveness and reconciliation with others, the Church, and God. For those loved ones who have died, we can be faithful disciples and pray for their souls so that we may be reunited in heaven. 

 

In his homily, the pope encouraged his listeners to have the Christian courage to reflect on how well their families were living the values of Christian love. We cannot allow the reality of family conflict to open our hearts to despair or rejection of Church teachings. 

 

After Matthew’s admonition in the Gospel to “stay awake,” he writes: “If the master of the house had known the hour of night when the thief was coming, he would have stayed awake and not let his house be broken into. So too, you also must be prepared, for at an hour you do not expect, the Son of Man will come” (Mt 24:37-44). 

 

John Paul II reflected on this passage: “This is the call that I repeat to you. Watch! Do not let the precious values of faithful married love and family life be taken away from you. Do not reject them or think that there is some other better prospect for happiness and human fulfillment.” 

 

The Holy Family gave us the model of the perfect family. The love they modeled was an active, sacrificial love in which they willed the good of the other no matter the cost to themselves. In this way of loving, we live holy lives, and our families become sacramental because we encounter and bear Christ. 

 

As Christians, it is our responsibility to strive for this perfection. We must use Advent to prepare ourselves to give sacrificially all year round to our family. With this love, Christ will transform our own hearts. He will then transform our families, the nation, and the world. I know because the Bible and Pope St. John Paul II told me so.