By Amanda Hudson, News Editor
St. Peter Parish in Geneva recently has begun a new ministry to provide a place of love and care for those affected by miscarriage, stillbirth and other types of baby loss.
Late last year, when a parishioner, Sarah, reached out to the Respect Life Ministry at St. Peter to see if they offered that kind of help, she knew that such support had not been readily available for her family following their own miscarriage some time before. Sarah wanted to make sure other mothers had the support she had not been able to find in her faith community.
St. Peter Parish now is ready to provide a place for families to come together as they grieve and try to understand their loss. The three main goals of the new Baby Loss and Miscarriage Ministry are: “1) Providing Practical Guidance for Moms During and Immediately Following a Loss; 2) Coming Alongside Grieving Moms and Families; and 3) Remembering and Praying for our Babies.”
The timing of Sarah’s initial inquiry had been perfect.
“Our (Respect Life) ministry was in the process of a relaunch after our then-new pastor, Father (Ryan) Browning, expressed his vision for us to move toward the Walking with Moms in Need model. We decided it would be wise to develop a ministry to support moms and dads following the loss of their precious (children),” says MaryKay Rogers, one of several parishioners who are now helping with the new ministry, which is a collaboration between the Respect Life Ministry and St. Peter Mom’s Group.
“Interestingly, this specific aspect of ministry had not even been on our radar yet as we were in the very early stages of investigation, trying to determine where there were service gaps for moms in need,” Rogers says. “As we began to hear about more and more moms who experienced an absolute void of resources following an infant loss, this gap became front and center for us. It was also not lost on any of us that the Holy Spirit appeared to be leading us to quickly start developing this particular ministry.”
Their efforts became inspired by the St. Gianna Beretta de Molla Shrine at St. Patrick Parish in Yorkville. Sarah and her husband attended a memorial Mass there for families who had experienced the loss of a child. Learning about St. Gianna, plus her own work to help develop the Geneva parish’s ministry, has provided some personal healing for Sarah, and she has become “the brains and brawn of (the St. Peter Parish) ministry,” according to Rogers.
Early on, organizers turned also to Elizabeth Ministry International in Mukwonago, Wis., for ideas, and they “ultimately started an Elizabeth Ministry Chapter at St. Peter so we would have better access to their multitude of resources to assist moms and dads following a baby loss,” Rogers says. “Sarah and members of the St. Peter Moms Group jumped in to develop
a program.”
“Many people from different walks of life in our parish community have voiced support for our ministry,” Sarah says. “Many moms have told us that they or someone close to them has experienced the loss of a baby, and they wished there was more support for them during those difficult times.
“Some moms have shared how difficult it is to figure out what to do in the immediate wake of their loss. Others have spoken about how lonely and isolating the experience is; oftentimes they face their grief and uncertainty alone. We use this feedback to guide our ministry as it grows and develops.”
Online and more
The Baby Loss and Miscarriage Ministry includes a wealth of information online (go to https.//www.stpeterchurch.com, click on “All Ministries” and select “Baby Loss and Miscarriage.”)
The site has practical advice for parents during and immediately following a loss including what to expect and how to find resources for delivery, burials, emergency baptisms, how to contact a priest, and more.
The site also explains how the ministry comes alongside mothers and their families in their grief. For example, the ministry distributes “Hope and Healing Boxes” that provide items “to help with prayer, grief, and remembering your baby,” it says. Those boxes were “a direct inspiration from the wonderful folks” at St. Patrick Parish in Yorkville, Sarah adds.
The ministry also connects grieving mothers one-on-one with those who have also lost a child. They listen, pray, and help connect mothers with other resources in the parish and the community.
“This ministry affirms the dignity of every life, no matter how brief, and provides space to honor the child who has been entrusted to God’s care,” Sarah explains.
Speaking from her own experience, she adds, “Our ministry is started and run by mothers who have experienced the loss of a baby … So far, we have ministered to moms with very recent losses, and those who lost one or more children over the past decade.
“We do anticipate meeting more families at our Mass of Hope on Oct. 11.” (see box)
Rogers sums up everyone’s hopes for the new ministry: “It is our desire that no mom or dad suffering from the loss of a child will ever face the barren desert that Sarah and her husband faced after the loss of their precious child.
“We hope and pray that moms and dads will view St. Peter as an oasis of comfort and a resource for moving forward in faith while healing physically, emotionally and spiritually following the loss of their precious baby.”
——- “This ministry affirms the dignity of every life, no matter how brief.” — Sarah
