Carmelite Father Marc Foley draws on St. Therese of Lisieux (also known as the Little Flower) in a book called “The Love that Keeps Us Sane.” He covers several aspects of her spirituality that can help connect our deepest selves and God — a relationship that helps us to keep a sane perspective of life here on this fallen earth.

 

A big quest for Therese was to remain “hidden.” That included being mostly silent about her relationship with God.

 

She discovered early in life that telling God-experiences to others can cause those moments to lose their effects. As a child, she was coaxed into sharing a healing experience of the Blessed Mother. As it was discussed by her family and others, Therese’s happiness disappeared. “The memory of that ineffable grace I had received was a real spiritual trial for me for the next four years,” she said.

 

“When we try to communicate an incom-municable experience ... it is depersonalized,” Father Foley explains. “It becomes an event, something that happened in the past. In Therese’s words, it became a memory of a grace.” 

 

Father Foley counsels against being completely open to the world, saying, “When we make a tabloid out of our intimate and personal secrets, can we ever behold them as precious again?” 

 

But he also does not recommend building an impermeable wall around ourselves. Instead, a wall with a gate “and a discerning gatekeeper” will help keep us sane, he says.

 

In her quest, Therese took concrete steps to be seen as ordinary and not interesting, good but not holy, average and commonplace rather than mysterious or stimulating. She accomplished her goal. Many of the nuns in her convent saw her as mediocre and even wondered aloud what the prioress could write about when she sent news of Therese’s death.

 

Why is being hidden helpful? Therese realized that to become simple and unpretentious was the truest and most holy kind of sanctity. She discerned that kind of holiness was authentic.

 

“One of the greatest dangers in the spiritual life is wanting to be known as holy,” Father Foley says. “Not only does pride damage our souls, it is also a main source of insanity, because it feeds our fear of what other people think of us.” 

 

Such a “hidden life,” he notes, actually makes the person “more vulnerable to the misunderstanding and rash judgments of others.” Therese experienced and endured such crosses.

 

“Therese chose to direct her gaze inward so that the opinion of God alone would matter to her,” Father Foley says. “In so doing ... she freed herself from the exhausting task of trying to win (others’) approval.”

 

That freedom gave Therese the ability to speak difficult truths when she felt God directing her to do so. Those “pure” truths were attractive, Father Foley says, because “there was never a hidden agenda or ulterior motive ... her words were free of the dross of egotism and self-interest.”

 

All of Therese’s efforts were done in silence, he adds, noting she suffered in silence “always in response to God’s will ... never ... because it was the pious thing to do.” He also says that the saint learned to refrain from justifying herself to others, instead applying silence, which, he adds, “preserves our peace of soul.”

 

“Custody of the senses” and “minding one’s own business” are also Theresian traits that can help us preserve our own sanity. Refraining from curiosity and focusing solely on doing God’s will keeps our personal feelings out of our reaction to the world’s dilemmas. Our feelings about greater events we can do nothing about will not be mixed with our egos. We also won’t concern ourselves with what God asks of others, which can prevent us from resenting our own crosses.

 

Finally, Father Foley notes that “What allowed Therese to live in a sane state of mind was not looking beyond her choices for a reward.” When she was not concerned about results, he says, “she freed herself from much worry and heartache ... for her the effort and the goal were one and the same.”

 

Father Foley winds up his thoughts on St. Therese and keeping sane very simply: “It is the love of God dwelling in our actions that makes us whole. It is love that keeps us sane.”

 

St. Therese can show us how to live more completely in God’s love and avoid a lot of the world’s craziness.